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Friday 29th of March 2024
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HOW DOES ISLAM BUILD THE FAMILY (2)

Let us read what the Glorious Qur'an says about these practical

principles and values in respect to marriage:

"And marry such of you who are single and the pious of your male

slaves and female slaves. If they be poor Allah will enrich them of

his bounty. Allah is of ample means, Knowing. And let those who do not

find means to marry keep chaste till Allah gives them independence by

his grace. And such of those who seek a writing (of emancipation) from

among those whom your right hands posses write it for them if you are aware

of any good in them, and bestow upon them of the wealth of Allah which

He has bestowed upon you. Force not your slave girls to whoredom that

you may seek enjoyment of the life of the world, if they would

preserve their chastity. And if one forces them, then, after their

compulsion, surely Allah is Forgiving, Merciful."

Holy Qur'an (24:32-33)

 

 

These verses are explicit in their call for marriage and to abolish

class and financial differences and to fight against prostitution and

sexual liberties.

In Islam wealth, class, color or even beauty, should not be an

obstacle in the way of marriage. The only criterion is goodness, piety

and having good offspring. These are the values and principles of

Islam which are derived from its humane spirit and objective look at

mankind and at the reality of the social activities and phenomena.

In addition to the Qur'an, the Traditions also play an important role

in stressing and confirming these values and concepts:

 

 

 

 

"Ali bin Asbat wrote to the Imam Muhammad Al-Baqir bin Ali bin

Al-Husain bin Ali bin Abi Talib (a.s.) complaining that he could not

find anyone equal to him in status to marry his daughters. The Imam

replied to him and urged him not to look at it that way, as the

Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) had said: If someone of good character and conduct proposes to your daughters, marry them. If you do not, there will be mischief and great corruption on earth."

 

The Messenger (s.a.w.) himself gave a practical example by marrying Zaid

bin Hanitha -his freed slave- to Zainab bint Jahsh - the Prophet's

cousin, - one of the noblest and most beautiful women. Later on, when

Zaid divorced her, the Prophet (s.a.w.) himself married her.

The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) also married Diya'a bint Al-Zubait bin

Abd Al-Muttalib of Quraish - a cousin of the Prophet too - to

Al-Miqdad bin Al-Aswad - who was far below her in nobility and tribal

position according to the customs prevalent in those days.

Commenting on this marriage, the Imam Al-Sadiq says:

"

 

By marrying Al-Miqdad bin Al-Aswad to Diya'a bint Al-Zubair bin Abd Al-Muttalib, the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) aimed at encouraging people to follow the path of the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) and simplify marriage and to 

remember that, `the noblest of you, in the sight of Allah, is the best in conduct' Al-Zubair was Abdullah's (the prophet's father) and Abu Talib's full brother."

The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) ordered Ziyad bin Labid Al-Ansari, a

nobleman of Bani Bayada to give his beautiful daughter, Al-Dhalfa', to

Juwaibir, the Prophet's poor companion. He used to live on charity,

with some other poor, familyless persons under a roof built for them

by The Messenger (s.a.w.) called "Al-Seffah."

The story of Juwaibir starts with a wonderful dialogue between the

Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) and his respectable companion:

 

"O Juwaibir,"

the Prophet said, "how about your getting married, so that your wife

may keep you chaste and help you with your world and your hereafter?"

"O Messenger of Allah," replied Juwaibir, "my father and mother be

your ransom; who would like me? By Allah (I have) no ancestral

nobility, no wealth and no beauty, so what woman would want me?"

"O Juwaibir," the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) replied, "Allah, with

Islam, lowered him who had been arrogant during the Era of Ignorance

(Jahiliyah), made him respectable, with Islam, who had been humiliated

during the Era of Ignorance, and abolished, with Islam,

superciliousness, and taking pride in tribalism and ancestry. Today

all people, irrespective of being white, black, whether of Quraish,

Arabs or non-Arabs, are sons of Adam; whom Allah had created from

clay. The most beloved of people to Allah the Exalted, on the Day of

Resurrection, are the most pious and obedient to Him."

Then he told him to go to Ziyad bin Labid and, ask for his daughter's

hand. When Ziyad heard Juwaibir's proposal, he could not believe it,

and turned away Juwaibir at once. But his daughter, Al-Dhalfa',

protested against her father's haughty attitude towards the Prophet's

order. Finally, Ziyad relented, changed his mind and gave his daughter

in marriage to Juwaibir.

These principles and noble values are embodied in the practical live the

progeny of the Messenger (s.a.w.), who were Imam of the Muslims and the

noblest of the Arabs.

It is narrated that the Imam, Ali bin Al-Husain bin Abi Talib (a.s.)

had a wonderful ideological dialogue with the Ommayyad Caliph, Abdul

Malik bin Marwan, who used to oppose the Imam (a.s.), insult and

belittle him.

It is related that Abdul Malik bin Marwan appointed an agent in

Al-Madinah to spy upon its people and report the matter. One day the

Imam, Ali bin Al-Husayn emancipated a bondmaid then married her. The

spy informed Abdul Malik, who wrote to the Imam saying: "It has come

to me that you have married your bondmaid, while I know there are

women in Quraish who are your equal and would bring glory to you by

marriage, and would give you worthy sons. But you neither cared for

yourself, nor respected your children."

The Imam, Ali bin Al-Husain (a.s.) wrote back to him: "I received your

letter reproaching me for marrying my bondmaid, claiming that there

were in Quraish women who would have brought glory to me if I married

them and have their children. But no one is superior than the

Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) in glory and generosity. She had been of my

belongings, I emancipated her from my possessions for a reward I

expect from Allah, then I took her back (married) according to His

law. Whoever is steadfast in the religion of Allah, nothing will harm

him. Allah has, with Islam, raised those who were despised, perfected

by it the defects, and removed worthlessness. So a Muslim cannot be

worthless, and worthlessness belongs to the Era of Ignorance."

 

27

When Abdul Malik read the letter, he was dumbfounded and threw it to

his son Sulaiman, acknowledging his failure in insulting the Imam

(a.s.).

Sulaiman, having read the letter, told his father: "O Commander of

the Believers, how boastful, Ali bin Al-Husain is to you!

Abdul-Malik replied, "O Son, do not say so, He is the most elegant of

all Bani Hashim who `split the rock and drank out of an ocean' (of

Knowledge)., Ali bin Al-Husain, dear son, gets higher where other

people get lower."

 

In this way Islam has removed the gravest and most hindering of

obstacles which contradicted the human spirit and nature.

Having managed to overcome this social handicap, and to change this

backward and ignorant way of thinking, Islam tackled another

materialistic problem, whose bad effect was hindering marriages and

the establishment of families, that is the problem of high

marriage-portions.

Having defined the concept of marriage as a universal and natural

system through which man performs the legal ties and connections,

Islam looked upon marriage-portion as a secondary thing and placed

marriage high above all materialistic benefits and interests. It

abolished all concepts which regarded marriage-portion as the woman's

price, or as wedding expenses.

Islam regards the mutual consent of both parties, the husband and

wife, as two corners of matrimonial relations, the best reason for

concluding a marriage,

 

*

while the marriage-portion is but a gift on

 

 

"The best women of my people are the most beautiful, but ask the

lowest possible `mehr' (marriage-portion)".

It has also been said:

 

 

"The blessing of a woman is her modest mehr"

 

 

Also, it is narrated:

 

"...as to woman, her misfortune is in her high

`mehr' and (troublesome) delivery..."

The marriage of Fatimah (a.s.), daughter of the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.),

was unique regarding her portion. She married the Imam, Ali (a.s.) for a

modest sum of money ever recorded in history with pride and

endearment, despite the fact that she was the daughter of the

Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.), the noblest of the women of the world, and

that her father could afford her with a wealth matching that of the

women of Ceasars and Chosroes. Yet his goal was much more superior and

Fatima's personality and her marriage were much higher above wealth,

furniture and the trivialities of this world.

History has preserved this wonderful picture with respect and

splendor;

When the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) wanted to marry his daughter to the

Imam `Ali (a.s.), he asked him:

 

"Have you anything to marry with?"

The Imam replied that except for a sword, an armor and a camel, which

the Imam sold for 480 Dirhams and handed the sum to the Prophet

(S.A.). The Prophet accepted this modest sum, and asked men and women

to purchase garments for the bride, some furniture and other household

necessities.

 

 

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